Grief & the Holidays
The holidays can be a mixed bag of emotions when you’re experiencing bereavement. There’s probably a sense of sadness or emptiness that someone important to you is no longer here, and you might feel an increase in depression around that time.
It’s important to make a plan for the day. Come up with a list of things you might want to do to honor your loved one that day. Accept that the day will be met with sadness and a sense of loss, but also know that you can do some things to combat these feelings and feel less heavy. See the list below for some ideas.
Be well.
1. Take flowers to the grave site, memorial site, or other place where you go to remember your loved one.
2. Look at old photos and home videos. Do this alone and have a good cry or reminisce over photo albums with family and friends.
3. Turn digital photos into a photo album on Shutterfly or Snapfish.
4. Donate a few of your loved ones old belongings to a shelter or other charity. If you don’t want to give away any of their things, just make a charitable donation in their name.
5. Volunteer with a charity or cause close to your loved ones heart.
6. Plan a memorial service or candle light vigil.
7. Reach out to someone else grieving the loss via letter, card, phone call, or e-mail.
8. Host a dinner party and invite those who knew your loved ones best.
9. Cook your loved ones favorite dish, use one of their recipes to prepare a meal, or host a pot luck and ask people to bring a dish your loved one liked.
10. Light a candle in honor of your loved one.
11. Visit or spend time in a place where you feel close to your loved one.
12. Take the trip you had been planning or dreaming about.
13. Read old notes, letters, or e-mails from your loved one.
14. Treat yourself to a massage.
15. Distract yourself by getting together with friends, going to the movies, or taking a short trip.
16. Watch your loved one’s favorite movie.
17. Make a mix CD of music that reminds you of your loved one.
18. Create a new ritual to celebrate the life of your loved one. Choose a ritual that can be repeated in the years to come.
19. Do something your loved one would have enjoyed.
20. Build a memorial with portraits, personal items, and objects that remind you of your loved one.
21. Spend time journaling about your loved one.
22. Make a toast or say a prayer or blessing in their honor.
23. Plant a tree in your loved one’s name.
24. Establish a scholarship in their name.
25. Celebrate the strengths you have developed as a result of your loved one’s death.
26. Search for joy and feel gratitude.
27. Make a keepsake box of things that remind you of your loved one.
28. Finish a project your loved one was working on.
29. Continue to work towards a cause your loved one was involved with.
30. Tell a story about your loved one to a stranger.